Unwell
by Benji's Riot Gurl
Summary: Matchbox 20 song fic; sequel to "I'm Just A Kid". Phil starts hearing voices. Slight PK. Please read and review!


Guess what? I don't own Rugrats or "Unwell"!!! Klasky-Csupo owns Rugrats and Matchbox 20 owns "Unwell".  
  
***This is a sequel to "I'm Just A Kid", so read that fic before reading this one. Otherwise, this one won't make much sense.***  
  
----UNWELL----  
  
The past month had been the same for me everyday. My friends went out, I was stuck at home. They went to school and hung out between classes; I went to school and stared at the ceiling between classes. They talked to each other on the bus; I listened to Good Charlotte on the bus. Everyday was a nightmare, a boring one at that. I couldn't believe that my own friends would leave me like that. I couldn't find any other friends, because I had a reputation in school for as long as I could remember. Phil DeVille was the kid you picked on, and anyone who hung out with me would get joked on. My friends weren't popular either, and they were nice to me in school, but they just ignored me after school.  
  
~All day  
  
Staring at the ceiling  
  
Making friends with shadows on my wall~  
  
I remember one Friday afternoon, my so-called "friends" went to the mall after school let out. They had made the plans on the bus, and somehow they had "forgotten" that I was there. I didn't want to hear it, so I turned the volume up on my CD player as "Jaded" by Mest pumped into my ears. However, just as Benji Madden started signing his part, my ears started to hurt because I had turned the music up so loud. I waited until my idol stopped signing his part, and then I turned it down a little bit and overheard Kimi talking. She said that her boyfriend David had broken up with her. Deep down I had liked Kimi, she was the friendliest to me out of all my "friends", but it didn't matter. She was one of them.  
  
Anyways, that afternoon I lied on the couch as I watched Rocket Power. However, I watched the ceiling more than anything. The shadows made weird forms, they looked like people and animals. Then, I swear I heard a voice. I figured it was the TV, so I continued to stare. But after a few minutes, I heard it again. So I turned off the TV to see what it was. I looked around, and there was no one in the house. My parents were at work, and Lil was at the mall.  
  
"You're not alone," the voice said. "I'll be your friend."  
  
~All night  
  
Hearing voices telling me  
  
That I should get some sleep~  
  
I shrugged it off and continued to watch TV, until Lil came home and Jimmy Neutron came on. Since I can't stand that show (A/N: Sorry JN fans! I just hate that show!) I decided to go surf the web since she wanted to watch it. I opened AIM, and saw four screen names that were on: Pnut_elf, QuEeN_aNgElIcA, singinsusie, and blink_kimi. Dil, Angelica, Susie, and Kimi were on. Obviously Tommy and Chuckie weren't on since Dil and Kimi were on the computers, nor was the other person on my list, my online friend, Tiffany. I surfed the web for about two hours, and not one of my "friends" sent me a message.  
  
When it was about 10:00, Lil came in and told me that she wanted to go on. So I signed off and gave her the computer, then decided to turn in. I stared at the ceiling once again, awaiting another sleepless night. Just then, I heard the same voice from earlier.  
  
"Get some sleep, we'll be OK tomorrow," it said. I looked around and saw no one near me.  
  
"Who are you?" I asked.  
  
"I'm a friend," said the voice. How could it be a friend if no one was around?  
  
"Phil, who are you talking to?" Lil asked. I looked up and saw her standing in my doorway.  
  
"Uhh, no one," I said as she gave me a strange look. Then she turned away and went back on the computer.  
  
~Because tomorrow might be good for something~  
  
The rest of the night I lied in bed and heard this voice talking to me, and even though it was disturbing at first, it grew comforting. This voice asked me about my well being and about myself, and I replied. There was an uncontrollable urge to reply to this voice, even though I could not see where or whom it was coming from. Maybe it was coming from my head, but that would just be plain creepy. After about an hour, Lil stood in my doorway again.  
  
"Phil, WHO are you talking to?" she asked as she folded her arms.  
  
"Nobody," I said irritably. "Leave me alone!"  
  
"You're crazy," I heard her mutter under her breath as she walked into her room. It was then that it hit me. I was hearing voices. I couldn't control them either. For the next fifteen minutes I tried to ignore them and banish them from my head, but I felt helpless and lonely.  
  
~Hold On  
  
Feeling like I'm headed for a  
  
Breakdown  
  
And I don't know why~  
  
I continued to lie there as the voices just flowed through my head. They treated me like a human being, they were like the friends that I didn't have, but they shouldn't have been there. I told them to get out, but they told me that they were there for me. I told them that I needed humans to be with, but they simply said, "The humans are ignoring you, but we're here." I was all alone in my room, yet I felt like there was a crowd of people standing around me. I tried many times in vein to convince myself that nobody was around me, but the conversations in my head told me different. I began to cry as the voices told me not to, which made me cry even harder. Yes, I, Phil DeVille, cried.  
  
~But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell  
  
I know right now you can't tell  
  
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see  
  
A different side of me  
  
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired  
  
I know right now you don't care  
  
But soon enough you're gonna think of me  
  
And how I used to be...me~  
  
I remember being so freaked out that night, all these voices just flowing through my head. This wasn't normal, and it was just plain scary. And I knew that Lil now had another reason for her and everyone else to ignore me. I hoped that she wouldn't tell people because it was so embarrassing, and people would think that I was crazy. But then again, was I?  
  
"You're not crazy," a voice said. I felt anger shoot up my spine because the voices wouldn't leave. The only way was for me to go to sleep, which I eventually did. Maybe the voices would be gone in the morning. Maybe I was just tired. But I didn't get much comfort because I heard the voices in my dreams. It's like they were actually there, and I talked to them in my dreams just like I had in real life. There was no stopping them.  
  
~Talking to myself in public  
  
And dodging glances on the train~  
  
The next morning, my alarm clock went off, and a voice said, "Time to wake up." I looked around, no one was around and it wasn't anybody on the Tommy and Rumble morning show. (A/N: That's a radio show on FM99 here in VA) I got ready just like I always had, the voices talking to me the whole time. I gave in and answered them, since no one was looking and there was no way to keep them quiet.  
  
When we got on the bus, the rest of the gang talked while I listened to music. "You really love Good Charlotte, huh?" asked a voice.  
  
"They are my favorite," I replied. "They kept me from committing suicide."  
  
"Why did you want to do that?"  
  
"Because I was just always fighting with my mother and my friends were always going out without me." Just then, I noticed Tommy, Lil, Dil, Kimi, and Chuckie were all staring at me.  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"He's been talking to himself," said Lil. By now everybody on the bus was looking at me. I was so embarrassed, I felt like I could have cried. I sunk down in my seat hoping that I could just suddenly disappear.  
  
~And I know  
  
I know they've all been talking about me  
  
I can hear them whisper~  
  
"Phil is going crazy," I overheard Tommy whisper to Lil.  
  
"He is," said Lil. "I have no clue why." Maddened, I ceased to listen to them talk about me. Unfortunately, I could hear the kids who sat in the seat behind me.  
  
"Phil DeVille talks to himself," said the girl. "That's just plain creepy."  
  
"What a dork," said the other girl. "He was always a dork, but now he's a psychopath dork!"  
  
~And it makes me think there must be something wrong  
  
With me~  
  
I never really cared what people thought about me, I didn't care if they made fun of me, but now they were right. Something was wrong with me; I had these voices talking to me.  
  
"You'll be fine," said a voice.  
  
"Yeah, because we love you," said another. I felt tears begin to rush to my eyes. However, I would not let them through. I was already embarrassed enough, the last thing I needed was for them to see me cry. Besides, if I did so, they would know that they got to me and they would use it against me. That's what sucks about people, if they know your weakness, they'll use it to make you even weaker. Except these voices. They promised me that they would never use my weaknesses against me.  
  
~Out of all the hours thinking  
  
Somehow  
  
I've lost my mind~  
  
Throughout the whole day, I continued to talk to these voices. It didn't take long for me to become dependent on them. They would automatically come and start talking, and like I said before, they comforted me. I felt like there were people around me, which was a feeling that I lacked for so long. But yet, I felt sick, because I wasn't supposed to be surrounded by voices in my head. Of course, it probably wouldn't have happened if my "friends" treated me better. Then, I would have talked to them and I wouldn't have had to talk to imaginary voices.  
  
~But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell  
  
I know right now you can't tell  
  
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see  
  
A different side of me  
  
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired  
  
I know right now you don't care  
  
But soon enough you're gonna think of me  
  
And how I used to be~  
  
That night was a Friday night, and Lil had Kimi over to spend the night. In the past, Chuckie, Tommy, and Dil would have come as well to hang with me, but not now. I had no clue what it was, because for years I was good to my friends. Why had they abandoned me? Now, I was just stuck with.......them. The voices.  
  
"We won't abandon you," a voice told me as I lied in my bed. "We will treat you better, things will get better." Those statements comforted me somewhat, and gave me a bit of hope. But it was all shattered when I questioned how long I would hear these voices. I didn't want to grow up with them; I didn't want to be the creepy guy down the street who talked to his hands. I remained thinking, until I fell asleep.  
  
~I've been talking in my sleep  
  
Pretty soon, they'll come to get me  
  
Yeah, they're taking me away~  
  
I had a dream, where I was driving. Which was weird, considering that I had failed my driver's test twice now, but hey, this was a dream. I was driving really fast in an old ghost town, and there was a car tailgating me. Inside were my "friends", and they all had big ears and long noses, and looked pretty damn scary. I looked to the passenger's seat where a black lab puppy was seated.  
  
"Step on the pedal!" he told me. I raised an eyebrow, then recognized the dog's voice. It was the voice that was in my head. I stepped on the pedal, but then the car stopped. The gas gauge stated that the tank was empty. I saw the other car speeding up to me, and I flipped out. They were going to get me!  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" I screamed, awakening myself. I looked up, and Kimi and Lil were standing in my doorway.  
  
"Phil, you're losing your mind," said Lil. "You were talking in your sleep!"  
  
"Fuck off," I said as she folded her arms. She went back into her room, and Kimi gave me a sympathetic look. Then she sat on the foot of my bed and just looked at me.  
  
~But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell  
  
I know right now you can't tell  
  
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see  
  
A different side of me  
  
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired  
  
I know right now you don't care  
  
But soon enough you're gonna think of me  
  
And how I used to be~  
  
"Phil, what's wrong?" she asked, her voice filled with concern.  
  
"Nothing, I'm fine," I said as I lied back down in attempt to go back to sleep.  
  
"You can tell me," said Kimi softly. "I know we don't see each other much anymore, but I'm still here."  
  
"Tell her," the voice in my head said. "Only she can know. She'll keep the secret."  
  
"You won't tell?" I asked as I sat upright.  
  
"I promise," she said.  
  
"Kimi, I've been hearing voices lately, I think because I'm lonely," I said quietly. "I can't control them, and I've become dependent on them. They're like the friends I never had."  
  
"You have us," she replied.  
  
"It doesn't seem that way," I said. "You leave me out of everything. But now I know you don't want to hang with me anymore."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"You think I'm crazy. But I'm not, I'm just a little.......unwell. I don't know how long it will last, but just remember me the way I was before."  
  
"Phil," said Kimi as she put a hand on my knee. "You're gonna be fine, you'll grow out of it someday, I promise." She gave me a comforting smile as the voice in my head said, "I told you things would be fine." Just then, we heard Lil calling Kimi from her room, so Kimi stood up. "Goodnight," she said as she placed a quick kiss on my lips, then headed to Lil's room. I felt my cheeks turn crimson red as the voices told me that I would be fine. I lied back down and began to fall back asleep. I was still frustrated since I still heard the voices, and I wasn't sure how long this would last, but I guess all I could do was wait. I hoped she was right, that the voices would go away on their own. But for now, I was a little unwell.  
  
~Yeah, how I used to be  
  
How I used to be  
  
I'm just a little unwell  
  
How I used to be  
  
How I used to be  
  
Well, I'm just a little unwell~  
  
---THE END---  
  
Hey peeps! First of all, I hope you guys had a good Thanksgiving and that you have a Merry Christmas!! As for Titanic Shiprats, as I said before, I will get it done, I just need to find some ideas. Maybe I should watch Titanic again. Probably the second tape 'cuz I can't sit thru that movie all at once.  
  
I want to thank the following for reviewing "I'm Just A Kid":'  
  
HGC_GCfan: Thanks! Well, GC is now in Germany, but I hope you went! They put on the best shows! As for the rumor, I never heard that one, but I doubt it. It's almost safe to say that it's not true, even.  
  
goofy monkey child: Thanks, I could really relate to "I'm Just A Kid" so it is good to know that I'm also not the only one.  
  
underestimated-gurl: I understand, school always messes everything up! Thanks!  
  
CrazyLake42: Thanks, and I do agree, I hate labels too. But don't hate me coz I saw GC! :'( lol! Don't worry, they're pretty fair about tour dates, maybe on the next tour. But part of the reason they come here a lot if because I live kinda close to Maryland.  
  
Athena Lionfire16: Thanks, and "I'm Just A Kid" is a good song. Simple Plan is a good band, but not as good as GC! ;)  
  
fanfic-reader01: Thanks. I know how you feel because I took what's happening to me and made it happen to Phil. But not in this fic! lol! It wasn't very nice too poor Phil, but usually I do this to Twister Rodriguez from Rocket Power, so I figured I'd give him a break! :)  
  
Princess Punky: Thanks!!!! Yeah, I saw my fianceé, aka Benji! lol! ;) GC puts on great shows! I'll update Titanic Shiprats when I get some ideas, I hope it will be soon!  
  
Lil Kimi: Thanks! Yes, I WILL REMAIN IN YOUR HEAD! MUHAHAHA! j/k. There are a lot of people who said they can relate, so we're not alone! :)  
  
Anyways, I wrote this because I heard the song and thought it would make a good sequel. I hope u guys like this, but I hope you can't relate because that would be............freaky. lol! J/K. Relate if you want to. :) Please R/R!! 


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